this and that

When theater of the mind should be closed on opening night

eileenm1230 — Fri, 22 May 2009 21:53:06 +0000

So, I usually blog about what I like, food, funny stuff, the ocean, etc. Well, here’s something I do not like- the radio ads for “Ashley Madison”. They suck. (pun intended) Here I am working away on my computer during the day listening to various funny sirius radio programs, having a grand ol’ time. Then, I hear this ad for the slimy website. This has the opposite effect of Corona ads. (I’m not going to say the name again) If you didn’t already know, this website is for married people looking to hook up. Apparently, mostly married guys, with some married women and single women. Ger-ross!! The guy on the ad goes on with numerous arguments to get you to think this is really a rational, and good, idea. Let me get this straight, I can go on line to this germfest and “date” a man with no future, maybe break up a marriage and potentially get killed by his wife? I’d like to see the numbers, and the real pictures of the people that sign up for this. It figures the guy that started this is no pin-up boy. The radio ad itself is creepy, the tag line is ”life is short, have an affair”, the whole time the commercial is on, there is this creepy funeral dirge playing in the background. Foreshadowing, perhaps?

This guy “Hungry” made me eat 3 donuts this morning!!

eileenm1230 — Fri, 22 May 2009 21:08:51 +0000

Weight Watchers understands what happens when “Hungry” shows up, and it’s funny when they tell the story. Not so funny in real life, when your routine lately is to skip going to the gym, and inhale 3 donuts for breakfast. I laugh at the ads (I give them a solid 9 of a scale of 1-10) like a 3 year old, especially when “Hungry” mimics the lady on her laptop, and flips open a pizza box and pretends to type…! OMG!! What a rotten little so and so! The ads are hilarious, who came up with this? I need to meet this comedic genius. (that’s what the post is referring to – “Humor”)

I’d like to ask them why they chose the color orange? Did they use that because it’s the color of the chakra related to hunger? Why doesn’t “Hungry” have a mouth? Will they ever put “Hungry” in a tux? Will they film “Hungry” on vacation overseas? So many questions, I hope they get answered. Maybe he’ll address these himself on his own facebook page. Holy crap, what is this world coming to?

It’s always 5 o’clock somewhere

eileenm1230 — Fri, 22 May 2009 20:22:54 +0000

Click here for the second best ad ever. I can’t think of another company that has such a visual impact in their ads. They’re always hypnotising to the point that I question if there are subliminal messages at play. I don’t know of a single person who doesn’t have the same Pavlovian response to Corona ads. You know- instantly your heart rate goes down, your eyelids droop just a smidge, and you could almost smell suntan lotion and the limes that you’re about to jam into an ice cold long neck bottle of Corona. It’s just that immediate. These ads just knock it out of the park every time with no end in sight. With the calming cerulean blue, and the usual place that they have you seated in (either a lounger, hammock, towel, etc.), and …wait a second – they put me into a trance. Are there words to their ads? I can’t recall. I had to check out the website, I guess they are usually just the sound of the waves and the seagulls. Whoever planned out this ad did a fantastic job. Being a person who loves the ocean, especially ones that sound relaxing, this was a great pick. The waves are gentle and not crashing too heavy, the birds seem to be flying and squaking low, and the colors of the water and sand are top notch. Perfecto! This is one of the few ads that piqued my interest enough to do some research on it. I’ve been to Mexico a few times, but next time I will track down this Paamul location where they filmed. I’ll start planning now for the ridiculous picture that I’ll take there that will be a future Christmas card that I will send out to all on my list.

Metallica befuddles CRM

eileenm1230 — Mon, 04 May 2009 00:23:06 +0000

So, I blogged about CRM’s before, and how they can recommend more merch for your dollars to be squandered on. But, what happens when the product and/or your tastes have changed? Case in point: Metallica. I remember the good ol’ days of the underground “Creeping Death” demo. Then the rightful reign of the “Alcoholica” years, roughly from the mid 80’s to the early 90’s. Now- they sound like crap, and Amazon “recommends” the latest jackassery of Metallica’s “Death Magnet”. Oh boy, puh-leeze. It sounds like a few sound bites of old Metallica are mixed in with James trying to actually hold a real tune (instead of ripping your ears off with his previous death roars) ,Lars plodding away on his drums to a different tune altogether, Kirk is trying to hold back an extended 80’s solo, and poor Robert has eff all to do but hammer away on the bass since he’s the “newbie”. Don’t get me wrong, I strongly recommend anyone with a drink or drug problem to go 12 step it. That is, unless they are a metal band. In that case, do not go to therapy and release all your demons (although the DVD coverage of it, “Some kind of monster” is hilarious in some parts), if that is what is driving your music.

I think my point here is that these recommendations need to be updated at some point. God forbid an actual human were to take a look, or a listen, to what is being recommended in Amazon. Come to think of it “God Forbid”, would have been a better recommendation for a CRM to make for me. Not quite Mastodon, but I shan’t be too picky.

Bend it like Beckham, haha!

eileenm1230 — Sun, 03 May 2009 16:49:14 +0000

This is arguably the best billboard ad ever. In 2007 all of the women (and approximately 10% of men) in NYC and London were treated to this hypnotizing slice of heaven. David Beckham in all his glory. Talk about a ballsy ad. This 50 foot billboard drove shoppers into a frenzy. There have been many reports of the increase in sales of Emporio Armani men’s underwear- the first week as high as 300% and continuing until today at an increase of 30%. Not too shabby. This particular “out-of-home advertising” should be credited for curing some agoraphobics, I’m sure it had to have happened. What else is there to say about this ad?

Extend his contract!

Midterm assignment- Jingle

eileenm1230 — Sun, 03 May 2009 16:04:15 +0000

This jingle is for a self tanning salon company. This would be for a spray-on self-tanning salon like Mystic Tan. The jingle is to promote self-tanning over the old fashioned tanning salons where you get baked by a tanning bed with harmful UV rays. I think I should trademark this: “Mystic tanning- all the color, none of the cancer”.

Merlot and cable infomercials don’t mix

eileenm1230 — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 00:10:13 +0000

I don’t see the mention of infomercials in the book when they talk about cable TV and the benefits of advertising there. Let me give you a heads up if you don’t already know- those commercials they show when you get home from a night out on the town are not accurate. Sure, they go on about how the makeup is flawless and the best you can buy, and that exercise equipment will make you lose 3 dress sizes in a day and can fold up and be stored under a bed. All that and there are only a few payments. Oh boy, look out when you get some $100 makeup that looks like it belongs at the dollar store, and that pilates table that can’t fit in a small bedroom will be debited $39 monthly from your bank account for eternity. That’s what should be added to this book. The book states how it’s less expensive on cable channels to advertise, and all that, but what about the consumer? You have the awful infomercials in the wee hours, and round the clock some of the cable channels play their commercials at ear drum breaking decibals. Great, you’ve just worked a long day and are sitting down for some chill-out time, oh nice, the history channel is showing how the catapult was invented. You’ve zoned out for a good 13 minutes of this, and a commercial comes on so loud that it blows your hair back. Who’s responsibile for this personal intrusion?

Don’t get me wrong, some of these seem like pure genius ideas with reasonable prices- like “point n paint”. But it’s the type of product you just don’t seem to get around to buying. Maybe because painting is such a chore that you dread and put off. Buying it is just admitting you will do it, you’re beyond the “to-do” list. It might be helpful if these advertisers stress the relief once you’re done. I’m not trying to be funny, that’s just helpful.

Vincent Gallo and advertising? Great timing!

eileenm1230 — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 22:35:38 +0000

So, I needed another blog, after a long time of staring out the window at the beautiful murky sky, it hit me! Vincent Gallo has been in H&M ads recently! They had the target audience and geographics in mind when picking him. I’m not seeing any ads locally, but on line it mentions the big campaign in NY, Boston and LA. I know if I were still living in NY, after seeing the ads with Vincent, I would run (literally!!) to the nearest H&M and buy all the pieces in the ads. That’s how crazy this guy makes you! The power of the “target audience” is twofold here. You have the consumers that are being targeted, and then you have all the media people that are being targeted. If you know anything about Vincent Gallo, you know simply having him there will generate a crapstorm of bad reviews. As long as they get the name right, right? He is a behemoth of a personality, to put it mildly. I love this guy. His art, his website, his amazing interviews, and his other-worldly eyes. There’s only one Vincent Gallo, and he actually agreed to do advertising for a company. The people at H&M where surely counting on Vincent to provoke people into giving their reviews of his performance, well- it worked. I haven’t seen such an uproar for a celebrity in advertising, since, well I don’t recall. But the important thing here is that it’s Vincet Gallo, people! I’ve looked up so much about this ad campaign that my computer is running slow now. I guess a virus scan is in order.

The magical 80-20 rule strikes again

eileenm1230 — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 21:20:40 +0000

Call me a nerd, but I got excited when I read 80-20 existed in advertising. It’s all over the place, and I don’t know why I’m so struck by it. I think maybe I was Vilfredo Pareto in my past life. The other examples are that you wear 20% of your clothes 80% of the time, and at work 20% of the employees do 80% of the work. The list is endless where this 80-20 rule comes up in life, it’s really interesting. In advertising, this means 80% of units sold are purchased by only 20% of the consumers. The book states this comes in handy when advertising Diet Coke. To go beyond the 80-20, diet Coke is actually 84- 8. Makes sense- when you have such a small segment buying so much, you need to pay attention. Is this book a combination advertising/rocket science book? That is some handy knowledge right there. I must say they started off strong with the 80-20 thing, but then it just got really boring with types of people and stuff broken down. I guess they need to put this common sense in here, but now I need to move on and search through some more crapola to eek out another 2 blogs tonight.

Fabutackalious

eileenm1230 — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 20:48:39 +0000

This may be a trend I’m starting- phoney words consisting of a combination of words(insert obligatory hyperlink here) as a subject line to blogs. This weeks installment is “fabutackalious”. It means an annoying person that over-uses a boring and/or tacky portmanteau. (ex. fabulosity, gi-normous, and the always clever-”guesimate”) What really tops it off is the look of accomplishment on the person’s face when they say these words. Priceless. What does this have to do with adverstising you ask? In 2005 Revlon had an ad for mascara that they were using to try to position themselves as better than Maybelline. Maybelline’s “Great Lash” has been around for possibly 5000 years, and all mascaras are compared to it. The ad that Revlon had for their new line, get ready for it…”FABULASH” was pretty funny. It was “Why settle for great, when you can be fabulash?” I personally refused to try this mascara based on the annoyance factor the name produced. What were they thinking to go after Old Faithful, and to use that name?

I guess this was part of the “confident sexiness” positioning that Revlon had started in ‘02. Has it worked? I think it has. When looking at the packaging, ads, and overall “feeling” of the drugstore brands of makeup, I’d say they seem to be more sexy than the plain-jane Maybelline and Cover Girl. But-does the feeling or label make me personally buy one over the other? No. I buy what works best, if I didn’t that would be redonkulous.